Wanda … unaware a Christian shouldn’t marry a JW

It was 1997 when I met Greg.  I was separated from my then husband, backslidden from God and raising my 4 children.  I was so far from God and had gone back to old ways and even worse.  I literally ran from New York City to Florida with my children to find a new life.  

I started a job at a medical clinic as a phlebotomist/lab tech assistant and it was there that I met Greg.  He was a patient there and seemed very happy when we first laid eyes on each other.  I was attracted to him almost immediately.  I gave him my beeper number that I happened to share with my eldest daughter and so it started.  Every single day we talked for hours over the phone.  I would get home and asked the kids, “Did Greg call”?  Most times they would roll their eyes and say, “No mom, Greg hasn’t called yet!”

It wasn’t long before I invited him to come live with us.  He was in a recovery house and didn’t want to stay there any longer.  I took a chance with him, knowing that he was in recovery.  But I felt like I needed someone in my life.  I didn’t think that I could function without a man in my life.  And so, he came to live with us.  During our phone conversations we found that we had so much in common, especially our love for God.  This really encouraged me to seek God once again.  However, I did not know until he came to live with us that he was raised a Jehovah’s Witness.  Once I found out though, I figured that it was okay because it was the same God that I once knew.  Little did I know how wrong I was.

Much changed in the household especially the celebration of holidays.  The kids and I were already coming away from the traditional Christmas celebration, so it really wasn’t a big deal, but birthdays, Thanksgiving, New Years and others were a no-no in our home now.  The kids were beginning to despise Greg, but I took his side all the time.  They began to resent me as well.  I had warnings from well-meaning friends about my choice, but I didn’t hear them.  I was more concerned about my emotional needs being met.  I was blinded by my own selfish desires.

After about a year and a half we decided to get married.  We felt convicted about living together and giving the kids a bad example of a “Christian” household. All this time though Greg was not living out his faith.  He smoked, cussed and was hard-hearted.  It was a terrible beginning and so much happened that should have made me run but I didn’t.  I felt like such a failure because of my first failed marriage that I swore to live this one out no matter what.

2016 was a significant year.  Time cannot tell the many things that happened in our family.  One Wednesday morning before going to work, Greg asked me if I would go with him to the Memorial that the Jehovah’s Witnesses celebrate every year.  I said we would see about that later and left to work.  That day we both came down with some kind of stomach bug so neither one of us could leave the house.  Praise God for that!

But the following Sunday he decided to go to the Kingdom Hall.  Next thing I knew, he stopped smoking in a couple of days, he stopped cussing and watching TV.  He started wearing ties, got rid of most of his jeans and was reading the New World Translation (NWT, the Watchtower’s version of the Bible).  He was in that Bible ALL the time!  It was such a dramatic turn around that I wondered if he saw an angel or had a vision.  I was in such turmoil and was attacked by heavy shame.  Shame because of his intense and passion love for reading the Bible.

But then he began sharing with me and getting angry when I wouldn’t agree with him.  He would yell at me wanting to know if I served Jesus or Jehovah or who I was praying to.  I began to wonder if staying with him was a wrong choice.  Over the years he has smoothed out and calmed down, but he is still faithful to the organization.  I know that he is conflicted because of his love for me but also because of my love for Jesus and my stance on never joining him in that Organization.  That is truly what it is, an organization put together by man.  I pray always that he sees the true love of God through Jesus Christ and that the veil is lifted off his eyes.  I know that God has a plan for him so I cannot leave.  As much as I’ve asked God to release me, I feel in my heart that God does not want me to leave.

It’s not an easy road but God is my strength and He gives me wisdom to endure.