Dear Friends,
In a high control group the most important control factor is the flow of information. We have all heard the saying that “a little knowledge is a dangerous thing” but the converse of that is that the lack of knowledge can be even more dangerous. The prophet Hosea said, “My people perish for lack of knowledge” (Hosea 4:6, see 1-6).
If you don’t have the knowledge of how to survive a trek in a rain forest you probably won’t be heard from again. Such an environment is hostile to almost all life forms. Human survival in such an environment is based on knowledge of the dangers and being able to adapt to them.
Interestingly, at least to me, religion can be like a dangerous environment where knowledge and adaptability are the two most important survival skills. For the sake of putting my analogy in a Christian context let me say that some environments are not very dangerous, if at all, while others on the opposite end of the scale are deadly. It should also be stated that the Christian gospel is not dangerous to anyone, but the legacy of the mass suicide over 900 members of the People’s Temple in Jonestown, Guyana, should never be forgotten lest it happen again.
Having set the scale of measurement between the extremes what are the telltale signs to look for in any group that might be problematic? In my Spiritual Abuse Recovery Workbook, I list thirteen characteristics of a high control group. An analysis of the reasons for each of the abuses will help you to understand why they exist.
There are essentially two reasons for high control mechanisms to exist. First, the “truth” of the group is not the truth at all and must be defended with lies and those lies must be strongly enforced. Second, the leader is a narcissist, or a controlling personality, and feels insecure or threatened by anyone around him who does not submit to his will. I think you will see this with each of the abuse symptoms …
… see the list in Part 3.
October 7, 2022 E-Letter
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Email: dhenkewatchman@gmail.com (If you would like to receive David’s current e-letters, request them here.)